A Winter Tapestry (Part - II)

 

24^th December (Christmas Eve, Friday)

 

Today my house is filled with lights, ribbons, candles and beautiful woody fragrance from freshly-cut Christmas tree.  Gordon is already baking in the kitchen and there is the smell of hot mince-pies emanating from the oven.

 

I can hear the voice of his favourite soprano, Kathleen Battle singing ‘Suo Gan’, a famous Welsh lullaby, from a Christmas album called Angels’ Glory (recorded in 1996) with the classical guitarist, Christopher Parkening. This is Gordon’s favourite version of ‘Suo Gan’. Kathleen Battle's soprano voice is breathtakingly beautiful and incredibly high, pure and resonant like a bell. 

Angels’ Glory is one of the most beautiful Christmas albums in the classical music genre. I fell in love with Kathleen Battle’s performance of ‘Silent Night’. It is absolutely exquisite. This album was recorded in The Abyssinian Baptist Church in New York City.

 

Kathleen Battle's Angels’ Glory (recorded in 1996 with the classical guitarist, Christopher Parkening) is Gordon’s favourite Christmas album, especially ‘Suo Gan’, Welsh lullaby from this CD, is one of his desert island tracks. You can listen to this track on this link

Christmas pop songs tend to be over-produced, loud and harsh. This album is such a contrast. It exudes peace and tranquillity. In this frantic season, these are the essential qualities we need most. Surely the essence of Christmas is its liveliness you might want to argue. But honestly, I prefer peace and tranquillity. 

Gordon is busy baking mince pies, cakes and scones 

Crème caramel - my favourite pudding

During the holiday season, an over-emphasis on having a good time often results in precisely an opposite effect. It is difficult to be jolly when one is afflicted by loneliness, bereavement, frenzy or frustration, which are the worst aspects of Christmas. I shall put a full stop here as I am in danger of sounding like the modern-day Scrooge. I prefer to be remembered as the modern-day Pepys rather than the modern-day Scrooge!

 

25^th December (Christmas Day, Saturday)

 

Happy 10^th Christmas! The sunrise this morning was quite heavenly. I surrendered to this wonder and to this alluring quality of light. There is no sign of white Christmas. It is bitterly cold outside and the gale force winds can be fearsome. 

The rays of the rising sun have no warmth and yet, they play upon on the dew lingering on blades of grass as though they were diamonds reflecting back to the sky. I opened my new journal and wrote a few lines before going downstairs. 

It is very insightful of Anne Frank when she wrote in her diary that "paper has more patience than people". I have learnt over the years that my journal has been the most steadfast ally and therapeutic form of writing which helps me reflect on my beliefs, my self-doubts, my mistakes and my hopes for the future.  

 

I am using the two colours – red and blue – from my favourite quilt for this year's Christmas decoration.

It is my nature to save things, hold the moment and make it an eternity. So, I have saved and dried all the flowers during the spring and summer months so that I can use them in my potpourri and decorate the centrepiece, the tabletop tree with dried flowers to convey the warmth of summer and to remind us of the lost treasures of the garden in the depth of winter. Now, all my favourite blossoms are preserved for a special moment. 

 

Here are fruits, flowers, leaves and branches…here is my heart which beats only for you. ~ Paul Verlaine ~  

 

I am using the two colours – red and blue – from my favourite quilt this year for the decoration. The quilt gives a theatrical backdrop with its lovely patterns and textures and an artistic touch of winter warmers. It is essential in this part of the world where winters can be frightfully cold and bleak.  Every so often, a gust of cold wind blows from the North Sea can send a shiver down the spine.

 

“No peevish winter wind shall chill…the roses in the rose garden which is ours and ours only.” ~ T. S. Eliot ~

Cocooning at home is one of my favourite winter's rituals. Snuggling up with a quilt at home with the candles lit, tea brewing, John Field’s (1782-1837) Nocturnes on the stereo player, fresh flowers on the table and a great book to read next to the fire. Quilts are essential winter warmers in Scotland and they add an artistic touch and colours to the cocooning ambiance.    

Poinsettia in a nice pot always looks regal in the room. The shape of the poinsettia flower and leaves are sometimes thought as a symbol of the Star of Bethlehem which led the Wise Men to Jesus. The red coloured leaves symbolise the blood of Christ.

Fish, halibut in particular, became our favourite meat for Christmas. We tried different types of meat, game, turkey, goose, chicken and duck over the years but most of these dishes gave us bad head and indigestion! So, we stick to having the whole halibut, gently cooked and seasoned with lemon and herb sauce and garnished with parsley or dill before serving. 

We had fish (halibut) baked with lemon and herb sauce and roasted potatoes and vegetables for Christmas dinner.

Gordon is a superb cook and what better time to display his culinary virtuosity and prepare our favourite dishes with delectable flavours. Between the two of us, we manage the artful combination of cooking and presentation. The desert is sumptuous classic crème caramel with a homemade ice cream which is fitting finale of a holiday celebration. 

 

The guests arrived at our doorstep, like windblown waifs, nearly frozen from top to bottom. We settled them in front of the fire with a drink to warm them up. We talked about books, writers, familiar places and memories.

We exchanged and opened our gifts before our dinner. Gordon’s gifts were a real surprise to me as he remembered I told him about my interest in a novel called ‘A Book of Memories’ (first published in 1986) by Hungarian author, Peter Nadas and an annual magazine subscription to ‘Slightly Foxed – The Real Reader’s Quarterly’, which is very generous of him.

 

An annual magazine subscription to ‘Slightly Foxed – The Real Reader’s Quarterly’. A gift from Gordon in addition to A Book of Memories by Hungarian author, Peter Nadas. Slightly Foxed magazine arrived with a handwritten postcard from the publisher. I thought it was a nice personal touch.

 

Who would have thought that we would be able to gather together like this and dining by the firelight after the warning to brace ourselves for the impact of the pandemic? I am grateful for a moment of wonder, a glimmer of hope and the true spirit of Christmas in the time when we are not fully out of the dark woods yet. My childhood memories of carol-singing at my grandparent’s home and dining together with Gordon and intimate friends are the two memories that will last forever in my heart.

 

26^th December (Boxing Day – Sweet Tidings, Sunday)

 

The village is very quiet. There is no sound except the wind outside, with its rattling of the blind against the window. The sky is the colour of peacock blue and the sunshine is interspersed with the fringed canopies of clouds. There is no sign of people going out for a walk or visiting the families. Boxing Day saw the return of a series of coronavirus restrictions in Scotland. This is possibly a reason why there is a melancholy feel to the surrounding. 

 

We are having an afternoon tea with two of our friends today. I am keeping the same table decorations except I re-arranged the table setting for the afternoon tea where the guests can help themselves. 

Gordon's Christmas Cake.

Palmier is French for “palm tree”. The French pastry is named like this because its shape resembles a palm leaf or butterfly.   

Tunnock’s – Gordon's favourite treat from his childhood. It is a quintessentially Scottish tea cake often served with a cup of tea or coffee. It was developed by Sir Boyd Tunnock in 1956. This confectionary company is based in Uddingston in Scotland and it is one of the oldest family firms in Scotland. 

Assembling a beautiful array of decadent treats, all manner of tempting sweets, homemade scones, mince pies and fruits presented on platters, trays and in pedestal bowls (everything looks better on a pedestal) to create a delectable and inviting candlelit display to celebrate the warmth of the season. I love an eclectic mix-and-match look and roaring fire also adds a cosy atmosphere and an inviting element to the table décor.

 

During our afternoon tea, we listened to a jazz Christmas album in memory of jazz musician and pianist, Mike Renzi who died this year. Mike Renzi arranged this most sophisticated and romantic Christmas album for the singer, Blossom Dearie and it is titled: Christmas spice so very nice. 

It is a splendid collection of Christmas love songs that are not very often played on the radio and they are arranged in slow tempo. Mike Renzi’s lush orchestration and ethereal voice of Blossom Dearie transport me to a forgotten time, when this kind of music was played over elegant dinners with loved ones.   

 

While we were having our afternoon tea, we listened to a beautiful music album in memory of jazz musician and pianist, Mike Renzi who recently died this year. Mike Renzi arranged this most gorgeous and romantic Christmas album for the singer, Blossom Dearie. It is titled: Christmas spice so very nice. It is one of my all time favourite Christmas albums. I love it so much. You can sample this album in this following link

I had a moment of solemnity while Gordon and the guests were talking about people they knew in their circle of friends who have died of or with Covid during the pandemic in the living room. Some of their relatives have also sadly “fallen off the perch” during the pandemic. At that point, I decided to go to the dining room for a moment of reflection.

It reminded me of a moment of tension felt by Clarissa in the middle of her party when she learnt about Septimus Warren Smith’s death in Virginia Woolf’s novel, Mrs Dalloway. “Oh” she think; “in the middle of my party, here’s death”. 

Mrs. Dalloway withdraws from her guests into a little empty room and reflects on the sad news. She then has a sudden illumination with this following line from Shakespeare’s Cymbeline Act IV: “Fear no more the heat o’ the sun” that causes her to embrace her own life anew and she decided to return to her party.  “…she must go back. She must assemble. She must find Sally and Peter. And she came in from the little room.”  

 

The poetic phrase of “Fear no more” has the echo of the biblical language since similar words were spoken, in the gospel account, at the Annunciation by the Archangel Gabriel to Mary when he informs her the conception of the child. He said to her: “Do not be afraid”.

 

In times of uncertainties over the past two years, most of us have experienced feelings of fear which are well-founded, but these feelings of fear, anxiety and the clouds of doom are a part of life. We cannot avoid them. But there are moments when these feelings can be lifted wherever people come together in sincerity to share in those acts of giving and receiving that express love and gratitude. So, like Mrs. Dalloway, I also decided to return to my party.

 

There is a line from T S Eliot that said: “We had the experience but missed the meaning”. I found this statement to be more relevant than ever before in a world where we tend to surf over experience. As a result of this, the meaning seems to fade into the background. But this Christmas, I am thankful to be blessed with both experience and meaning in which the spirit of friendship and love shines through our life’s difficulties and disappointments. 

In the coming year, I would like to be able to delve into or pay more attention to the meaning so that it begins to make itself known in the foreground of the experience. 

 

I wish you all goodwill, good fortune, good health and much joy in the coming year. May you also be blessed with both experience and meaning of love and friendship. In the deep black heart of the winter, may you be blessed with a moment of wonder, a glimmer of hope and a cheerfulness of spirit.

Happy New Year.

“The moments of happiness – not the sense of well-being,/Fruition, fulfilment, security or affection,/Or even a very good dinner, but the sudden illumination – /We had the experience but missed the meaning...” T. S. Eliot, The Dry Salvages

“…he had found life like an unknown garden, full of turns and corners, surprising, yes; really it took one’s breath away…” Virginia Woolf, Mrs Dalloway